Tuesday, April 24, 2018
Parenting & Relationships

Tell Me About It: Social daughter pushes mom’s boundaries

Social daughter pushes mom’s boundaries

Q: So I am an introvert, and it has taken me years to finally accept this and allow myself to be happy alone, rather than constantly trying to appease my extroverted family with attempts to socialize that ultimately just made me feel like a wallflower.

My son is like me, but my daughter got the extrovert gene, and has more friends than hairs on her head. She seems to thrive in big crowds. She is still at an age in which I need to supervise her social engagements, and I often feel like the odd person out in the mother groups, who can chat easily with each other while I hide behind my Kindle.

Any advice for this wallflower mother as she tries to navigate her social-butterfly daughter’s activities?

Introvert

A: My advice for any child-rearing-related problem that (1) is not dangerous, merely taxing/annoying, and (2) will eventually go away, is to give yourself permission to piece together ways to get through it. So, yeah, Kindle.

But do step away from it sometimes for limited stretches. It’ll facilitate your daughter’s deeper friendships — kids get invited many places through parents —and model for her the importance of getting out of our comfort zones. Even if she doesn’t understand it now, it’s a seed for later.

Plus, you might make a few nice connections in spite of yourself that you can turn into quiet coffee visits.

Wrestling with the idea of having children

Q: I’ve just crested the mid-30s hump and I still can’t decide whether or not I want to try to have kids. My husband is equally agnostic. How do you know when you know, you know?

Bio Clock is Ticking

A: You don’t want-want kids, so just decide not to have them.

Then live with that decision for a while. See how it fits. It is, after all, the far easier decision to reverse if you change your mind.

Comments

Tell Me About It: Sister’s remark is a teaching opportunity

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Tell Me About It: Mom fears she has discussed sex too soon

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Underoath’s Spencer Chamberlain talks breakup, reunion, getting sober and returning to St. Petersburg

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Published: 04/20/18
Updated: 04/23/18
Top things to do in Tampa Bay for the week of April 23-29

Top things to do in Tampa Bay for the week of April 23-29

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Published: 04/23/18

Tell Me About It: Family reconsiders taking group trips

Q: Should there be expectations about taking vacations/trips with other family members? We have two issues:(1) We have three kids, including teenagers, and my brother and wife have two kids. The younger is 6. My wife and I find it hard to plan someth...
Published: 04/20/18
On its 20th anniversary, Disney's Animal Kingdom credits conservation with longevity

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ORLANDO — When Disney’s Animal Kingdom opened 20 years ago, it was light on thrills and heavy on conservation. On April 22, 1998, Earth Day, the Orlando park had a single thrill ride, Countdown to Extinction, and a handful of shows like ...
Published: 04/19/18
Updated: 04/20/18

Tell Me About It: How to deal with conversation dominators

Q: We have a few relatives, including a sibling, who we don’t see or hear from often, as we are busy or live far away. We meet over a meal or for an hour or so, or at family gatherings requiring a drive, and I am so frustrated that they dominate the ...
Published: 04/19/18
Huge concert week in Tampa: Foo Fighters, Kenny Chesney, 98 Rockfest, more

Huge concert week in Tampa: Foo Fighters, Kenny Chesney, 98 Rockfest, more

PURE NIRVANA: Foo FightersDave Grohl may be America’s last unquestioned rock god. He’s played with Kurt Cobain and Jimmy Page, Tom Petty and Trent Reznor and St. Vincent, and he also leads a pretty decent group — perhaps you’ve heard of them — called...
Published: 04/18/18
Updated: 04/20/18
Plan your weekend: Kenny Chesney, ‘The Producers’ in the park, Mainsail Art Fest, Sugar Sand Fest, Earth Day

Plan your weekend: Kenny Chesney, ‘The Producers’ in the park, Mainsail Art Fest, Sugar Sand Fest, Earth Day

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Published: 04/18/18
The newest trend for Tampa date nights? Indoor ax throwing

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Axe Throwing Tampa and Raider Axe Lodge are bringing the axe-throwing trend to the Tampa Bay area.
Published: 04/18/18